Archive for September, 2007
Ballpark Food
by Todd Pheifer
What’s wrong with these vendors
Loudly hawking their wares?
An arm and a leg for a beer,
And nobody cares!
Of course I can hold off,
But my kids are entranced
With the cotton candy man
Weaving sugary romance.
He comes down the row,
Waving food at eye level.
Away from us, man!
Your food is the devil!
We’ve brought our own, thanks,
Smuggled in Mom’s big pack,
Peanuts and popcorn
And goodies for snacks.
So enjoy the ballpark
And the shifting strike zone,
But if you want to eat there,
Better take out a loan.
Posted 9/28/07
Tales of (Trevor) Hoffman
by Stu Shea
Change-up, change-up.
He makes hitters clowns.
It floats to the plate
And it sits right down.
Change-up, change-up.
Off mediocre “heat,”
You feel real comfy,
But still you get beat.
I wonder if Hoffman
Throws change-ups in bed
Or if Mrs. Hoffman
Likes it “dead red.”
Posted 9/27/07
Stretch Run and No Manny
By Stu Shea
Where’s Manny?
Where’s Manny?
All Boston’s getting clammy.
The Red Sox are in danger of a troubling declanny.
If “Manny being Manny”
Means pulled muscle or strained hammy,
Opponents dance and laugh
Because he can’t give them the whammy.
If Terry F. is canny,
He’ll come up with a planny
To help the Red Sox win it
Even if they don’t have Manny.
But if Coco’s cold and Papelbon
Cannot escape a jammy,
The Fenway Faithful might cry out
For someone else…like…Sammy?!
Posted 9/26/07
