Where Will All The Feral Cats in Shea Stadium Go?

by Sid Yiddish

Apologies to Pete Seeger and his “Where Have All The Flowers Gone?”

Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?
Long time hissing,
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?

Perhaps they’ll go live down in the sewers
with all the giant super rats,
that’ll make tasty meals for all those cats

Oh, where will they all go?
Oh, where will they all go?

.
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?
Long time hissing,
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?

Now that Durocher’s not there
To stare him down,
Well I guess that’s what Lou Pinella is for

Oh, where will they all go?
Oh, where will they all go?

.
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?
Long time hissing,
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?

Maybe they’ll all hook up with Billy Joel; he needs a new backing band,
if that last album of his doesn’t tell
you anything, then these cats will

Oh, where will they all go?
Oh, where will they all go?

.
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?
Long time hissing,
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?

They’ll go clubbing with Howard Stern
He can never have enough cats on each arm,
While turning on that shock-jock charm

Oh, where will they all go?
Oh, where will they all go?

.
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?
Long time hissing,
Where will all the feral cats in Shea Stadium go?

To feed the hungry, to feed the poor
Who can never afford much more than they make
Catsup & salt upon feral cat steak!

Oh, where will they all go?
Oh, where will they all go?

For more on Sid Yiddish’s poetry, music and performances, check out his My Space page.

Posted 10/28/08

On Rocking and Rolling and Focus

by Todd Herges

Why is it that the nation’s wide-angle lens
is replaced each Fall with an electron microscope?

The better to focus in on a game –  the pastime –
an inning
an at-bat
a single pitch!

And how is it that this incredibly narrow-focused lens
can yet cause the scorecard to ignite
even though the days have grown so short,
the nights so cool,
the games so long?

The players step up to the plate,
they step up their games.
Crunch time.
It’s all been laid on the line.

And with tens of thousands screaming
within easy earshot,
and tens of millions more watching,
this fact easily near the top
of each player’s mind,
somehow, some way, they
show us heroics.

Posted  10/27/08

Whore Me Out at the SkyBox

by James Finn Garner

In honor of the 100th anniversary of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame” and the 85th and final year of Yankee Stadium.

Casey Kelly had quite the job,
Quite the envy of every slob.
This businessman was a slip’ry eel,
Cutting deals, greasing wheels.
He knew f*ck-all of the national game,
But of this he was not ashamed.
When he saw poor saps lined up at the park
Trying to buy tickets, he’d bark,

“Whore me out at the skybox!
My firm takes care of the tab.
Clients just flew in from Washington.
We need to get plastered to get the deal done.
Oh, we’ll write this off on our taxes,
Champagne, sirloin and fresh lox.
We might

EVEN

WATCH

SOME

Of the game
From our sweet skybox!”

Posted 10/23/08

Don’t the Fans Just Love It!

By Stuart Shea

The players fight at second base,
And don’t the fans just love it!
Some guy has blue paint on his face,
And don’t the fans just love it!

We’ll all yell loud and drink some beer,
We’re all so sure this IS the year,
We’ll scream ’til we forget our fear.

I don’t recall Mom’s maiden name…
And don’t the fans just love it!
I”ll look it up after the game,
And don’t the fans just love it!

Thank God the kids are back in school!
I’ll watch the game beside the pool.
My chin is covered with my drool.

I’ll buy my playoff tickets now,
And don’t the fans just love it!
I’ll pay the mortgage–don’t know how–
And don’t the fans just love it!

The owners and the players earn
More money than Britney can burn…
I’ll cry when I see my tax return,

And don’t the fans just love it!

Posted 10/22/08