Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
All will be forgiven
If we keep on livin’
Oh, 5 thru 9 please get on base
I’m not lyin’
I’ve been cryin’
When you’re up to bat in your place
The hittin’ coach is at fault, the nerve!
He never taught you to hit the curve.
Oh, 5 thru 9 you can ding their ace.
You could really help down the stretch
Maybe it’s Roy’s “Wonderboy” you could fetch
Oh, 5 thru 9 join the chase
Only 10 games remain
All year you have driven me insane
Oh, 5 thru 9 please help us win the race
Yesterday in 1971, Jim Palmer shut out the Indians 5-0, becoming the fourth member of the ’71 Orioles’ pitching staff — after Dave McNally, Mike Cuellar and Pat Dobson — to win 20 or more games. The only previous staff to boast four 20-game winners was the 1920 Chicago White Sox.
Cuellar, McNally, Palmer and Dobson:
These are the men who’ll finish the job, son
To keep hitters down or stifle a rally,
Call Palmer, Dobson, Cuellar, McNally.
Batters looking so dead, they might need an embalmer
McNally, Cuellar, Dobson and Palmer.
If any could beat them, don’t know who they are,
Dobson, McNally, Palmer and Cuellar.
H/t to Big Hair and Plastic Grass: A Funky Ride Through Baseball and America in the Swinging 70s.
Astros reliever Chuckie Fick?
Broadcasters hope he doesn’t stick.
They like him fine–don’t get me wrong,
But flub his name, and you won’t work long.
In Milwaukee
A year ago
Late inning leads
Meant Brewer victories
Ax and K-Rod
Were automatic
This season
Bullpen in disarray
No lead safe
Frustrated fans wonder
What happened
To yesterdays heroes
Those Oakland A’s are on the pennant track,
With Billy Beane stalking giants like Jack.
Up the standings they rise,
A low-budget surprise–
The “Moneyball” Crew back in the black.