Not Ready for This Jelly
By Stu Shea
The Cubs’ bullpen is toast;
It can’t preserve, just fade.
Now when they’re in a jam,
They’ll have no Marmol aid.
The Yankees Losing & My Angst
by Stephen Jones
Right now, The Yankees are playing
Like a bunch of talent not thinking.
Often it leaves me head scratching.
Baseball is a part of my long hot summer –
True, expectations weren’t high this year –
But this new mental swoon is team disaster.
Truth be told, win or lose I’ll watch the team,
But when it splits its collective mental seam
My rational thought leaves the room.
What’s happening is not Baseball 101.
No, this is baseball being undone.
My team win or lose, but where’s the fun?
Blame the pitching, blame the hitting;
To me, it’s summer school . . . of non-thinking.
And right now, it leaves this fan reeling.
Some Clerihews for the Tigers’ Starting Rotation
by James Finn Garner
Justin Verlander
On the mound don’t meander.
He comes from Old Virginny
And his fastball isn’t finny.
Max Scherzer
While pitching couldn’t be terzer.
Blue eye or brown
He’ll mow your lineup down.
Sanchez (Anibal)
Might be a cannibal
The way he feasts on the gray matter
Of batters.
Doug Fister
Will get a blister
If he don’t lay off of all
Those fireballs.
For more on clerihews, click here.
If…
By Stu Shea
If Bud Selig were alive todays
He’d take some action on the Oakland A’s.
They want to move down south a ways
To escape the Giants’ hold on the Bay.
So why not let the Athletics go,
And draw the well-heeled from Palo Alto?
It’s not as if O.Co is more than so-so,
And they’d love gold and green down in Los Gatos.