Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
That ball.
Its color?
White with flecks of brown.
Its seams?
Red.
Faded red.
That ball.
Leaves the pitchers hand.
It twists.
Taunts.
Can turn the mighty to the meek.
The meek to the mighty.
It makes you.
It grips you.
It mocks you.
It sails slowly.
It journeys its way to my bat.
It keeps you up at night.
Is the perfect antagonist.
To any batter.
The sad part is.
I like it that way.
“I’d rather go look at dinosaurs,”
Said Carl Edwards, Jr., today,
“The kind with frightening jaws
And claws to capture their prey.
“Who lusted for brainless rampage
And death and destruction to spread.
Unlike the cruel monsters of our age,
The ones in the museum are dead.”
Brewers vs. Pirates
Revering the Beard
Crew needs the facial power
To put down the Bucs
Game 72. Pirates 8, Brewers 1
The offense dries up
Garza and Wily are not
The pitching answer
Game 73. Pirates 7, Brewers 3
With a six-run first
Pirates pile on Zach Davies
Crew quiet again
Game 74. Brewers 4, Pirates 3
Santana comes through
While Arcia golden gloves
The final grounder
Game 75. Brewers 4, Pirates 2
Behind Chase and Shaw
Crew earns a split of series
Still hanging in first
An ardent and ballsy debater,
At arguing calls none was greater
His jowls had a fit
As he howled and he spit
A gnarly and balding old tater.
An ivy leaf from Wrigley Field
It must be like a fine wine,
vintage 2016
And that doesn’t include S&H,
which is $15 per leaf And
there’s a limit: 10 leaves/customer
Why so few–
is there a shortage?
Or is it concern–
that too many leaves
makes a bouquet?
Nonetheless, it is a leaf
and not some dirt,
like the Yankees sold one time
That’s right–it was dirt,
just plain dirt
At least the leaf grew–and
flourished–just like the team.