by Tony Puma
“Take me out to the ball game”
Please stand for the National Anthem.
The Home Team takes the field: PLAY BALL!
Bottom of third, man on base,
pitch low and inside, count 3 & 2.
Fastball, strike 3, Batter out.
Man left on base.
The Mick, Duke, Willie, Jackie, Pee Wee,
The Scooter, Yogi, Joe D., Dizzy and Daffy,
Who’s on first. Abbott & Costello.
Red Sox and White Sox.
“take me out with the crowd”
Twi-light double header:
Cardinals and Orioles.
Da’ Reds/Dem Bums/ The Gas House Gang
Murderers Row/ The Bronx Bombers.
Reliever: South Paw ,Knuckleballer, 2.52 ERA.
The Sultan of Swat/The Splendid Splinter.
The Iron Man.
Lou Gehrig’s disease.
“buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack”
Bottom of 7th, nothing-nothing.
Seventh inning stretch.
Padres and Angels.
A No-Hitter/A Perfect Game.
“I don’t care if I never get back”
Designated Hitter/Pinch Hitter.
Foul ball/Double play.
Catcher gives the sign.
Tying run at the Plate.
The Yankees win the World Series!
Brooklyn Dodgers and New York Giants:
Topps Baseball cards.
Indians and Braves.
Can’t anyone here play this game?
“let me root, root, root for the home team”
Rain delay/Box scores/Extra innings/K’s/RBI’s.
Only the ball was white.
Where have you gone Joe Dimaggio . . .
Devil Rays and Marlins.
Frozen Rope/Texas Leaguer.
Bull Pen/Home Plate/Batter’s Box.
Old-Timers Day/All Star Game.
I GOT IT!
“if they don’t win, it’s a shame”
Tagged out/Stolen base.
A swing and a miss.
Pitcher’s mound/Rosin bag/The Rubber.
Red Bird/Phillie Phanatic.
Cubs and Tigers.
A Sinker, down-and-out.
“for it’s one, two , three strikes you’re out
I watch a group of kids playing
baseball in a cow pasture.
“at the old Ball Game.”
by Stephen Jones
Ryan Raburn’s awful throw –
Perhaps the most errant ever made
(At least so far this MLB season,
As tabloids quickly blurted) –
Left Cleveland fans in disbelief.
It was painful to watch and
Made ESPN’s “Not Top 10″
But, as one pundit did remark,
While Raburn is a Golden Glover
This one errant bit of fallibility
Reinforces our short-term memory and
“What’ve you done for me lately?”
by Michael X. Ferraro
There is no base coach at second.
Otherwise, Kipnis may’ve reckoned
that Jeter’s feigned catch was deceit
to get him to slide on his seat.
But doubled off first, he got burned
with a bitter life lesson learned:
Always keep your eye on the ball–
Not the guy who’s stamped for the Hall.
Here’s a video of Derek Jeter’s play at second that confused Jason Kipnis on Monday. Heh heh.
by Susan Petrone
There’s something I want to talk about but broach with apprehension,
For if you state the obvious, the Jinx will pay attention.
There is no monster in Lake Erie, of that you can be sure
But beware the Jinx who dwells within the salt mines off the shore.
The Cleveland Jinx is green and chunky with breath like stale burritos.
He wears flip-flops and a beer-stained jersey from Rocky Colavito.
When the team is doing poorly, you won’t see the Jinx,
There’s no fun in messing with a team that really stinks.
But when the Tribe shows signs of life and fans begin to hope,
The Jinx’s one-word answer is a loud, resounding “Nope.”
He’ll fiddle with the strike zone, the pine tar, or a mitt
And anything he thinks will stop a run-scoring base hit.
The Jinx can’t help it, it’s his job to purloin a winning streak
He lives upon our broken dreams and random bursts of pique.
So how does the Tribe fare? Of that of which we must not speak.
All that I can safely say is it’s been a hell of a good week.
Susan Patrone blogs about the Tribe at It’s Pronounced Lajaway.
by Stuart Shea
Can the Sox play tough?
White indicates purity…
Are dirty suits allowed?
If only Swisher
Struck out more often…but then,
Truth ain’t poetry.
The old roar is gone…
No more sneaking cigarettes.
It’s a young man’s turn.
It is difficult
To keep from strangling youth with
Mauer ain’t sour,
He’s heretofore banished from
Those bad Twins hurlers.