Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
The Tigers broke out of the zoo
And pummeled the team “You know who”
.   With our hitters on tap
.   And our pitchers with zap
They out-Yankee-ed the Yankees, Yahoo!
A contributor from Bardball’s rookie year, Millie Bovich has been a devoted fan of the Detroit Tigers for eight decades.
All the network media dorks
Sing the praises of New York
They hate visiting places strange
Like Motown and the Texas Range
They’d rather crawl through Gotham sewers
Than watch the Snakes or Rays or Brewers.
They’re happy as a dog with bone
To stay in th’ Eastern Time Zone.
But Yankees pitching ain’t worth a lick.
The Phillies are my pick, in six.
They were losing so nobody spoke
No schmoozing, no boasting, no joke
.   From the bench not a mention
.   Just a clenching from tension
No boos heard in Boston, just “Choke!”
The Cardinals are blanking the Astros again,
And they’ll make the playoffs if the Braves can’t win.
I wish I was there for this wild-card craze,
But I’m stuck in Seattle covering the A’s.
Hey! Tampa came back from a 7-0 hole,
Dan Johnson just tied it–right off the foul pole!
I’d love to be seeing the Yankees and Rays,
But I’m stuck in Seattle covering the A’s.
Did Baltimore really just walk off the Sox?
And Papelbon pull one more of his rocks?
So Tampa and St. Lou are in. I’m amazed
That I’m stuck in Seattle covering the A’s.
It’s cold in this pressbox at Safeco Field,
And watching a meaningless game is the yield.
The action is elsewhere, and it’s one of those days.
I’m stuck in Seattle covering the A’s.
Inexplicable meltdown
In Boston leaves are falling
No Autumn splendor
Instead play-off hopes
Free-falling without a net
And time running out