Pork Haiku #1
By Gary Gillette
In honor of broadcaster Mario Impemba who, during the April 12 Tigers broadcast, talked about how Royals skipper Trey Hillman had managed the “Ham Fighters”…
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Nippon Ham Fighters!
WTF? Americans
Fear Pugnacious Pork.
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Posted 4/29/10
Opening Day
by Stephen Jones
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Like Christmas a day
to be opened
bat and ball ball and bat
to argue in summer sunshine
disputing calls/balls on base
here/there and beer and brats
and then a quiet ride home
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Posted 4/14/10
On a Possible Rockies-Cardinals Playoff
By Stuart Shea
Rocks usually roll downhill.
These Rockies aren’t just landfill.
Left for dead in early May,
They’re in the playoff hunt today.
Playing halfway up the sky,
The Rockies feel a mile high.
The Cards may be their October foe,
Which ought to make a lovely show.
They’ll face a guy they used to pay–
That hitting star, Matt Holliday.
With Denver smog vs. St. Louis heat,
The Coors and Bud should flow quite sweet.
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Posted 9/22/2009
“And He LINES to Third for the Second Out of the Inning!”
by Todd Herges
Harry Caray, a cup ‘o Bud and thou:
A day-game audience tuned to Channel 9.
With Stone up in the booth to keep it sane,
Up to the plate steps Galarraga now.
The bums in left all crowd around The Man,
Girls topped in bikinis fight to kiss his cheek.
Harry would like to do this every week
But risks abound: beer vendors in the stands.
(He can’t quite hold it like he did in youth.)
Late in the game, while drinking his last pitcher -
Though bleacher visits each time thrill the crowd -
Steve must correct his mis-call from the booth:
“Um, Harry, that was thrown from the catcher.
The Big Cat, Galarraga, just struck out.”
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Posted 6/15/2009
Let’s Watch Two!
by Todd Herges
Bright dawn blue sky
Cubbies play at 1:05.
Dad, Mom, sons, daughter
Head like lambs unto the slaughter..
Ride aboard the red line El,
Hope that Z will throw it well.
See the green, the grass, the board,
Hope Dad’s cash he will not hoard.
See the wall, the bricks, the ivy,
Hope that Z K’s Junior Spivey.
Smell the stale beer, puke, and links
D Lee’s sitting – Dad’s heart sinks.
But then Aramis hits a double,
Spoils the no-no, causes trouble.
Up in the booth a new guest sings
But not like Harry’s echoed rings.
One son for extra innings thanks
This day was one for Ernie Banks.
As Holly wraps it up so well,
The family knows the day’s been swell.
Then back aboard the loud red train
To the hotel – it looks like rain.
Glad it held off for these few hours,
Maybe thanks to higher powers,
Hack and Harry and Chance and Brown
Stand in the clouds and look straight down
Into the green grass lined by Waveland,
Sheffield, Addison – Chicago’s Graceland.
They held back rain, they hold back tears,
Been over a goddamn hundred years.
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Posted 5/28/2009
