Browse all poems and songs in the 'Milwaukee Brewers' Category


Tainted Bud

by the Village Elliott

Once the Hall was for those who were studs
Whose names were not dragged through the mud.
Seems no longer the case
With Bud Selig in place,
Sets new precedent with tainted Bud.

 



Slipping Suds

By Stuart Shea

What’s happening to those Brewers?
To those blue, gray, and pee-yellow Crewers?
As the Cubs make the plays,
All Milwaukee now prays
Their year doesn’t go straight down the sewers.

 



All-Star Clerihews, Part III

Michael Conforto
Wrote a sad concerto
About what it really means
To play in Queens.

Corey Knebel
Cleared the table
Once in Bay View playing pool,
Which is the Wisconsin definition of cool.

DJ LaMahieu
Has bid adieu
To old self-centered habits
To start a shelter for homeless rabbits.

Justin Smoak
Almost went broke
With an investment scheme
For anti-strike-out cream.

 



Milwaukee Haiku, June 2017

by the Brewer Haiku-er (@brew_haiku)

Brewers vs. Pirates

Revering the Beard
Crew needs the facial power
To put down the Bucs

Game 72. Pirates 8, Brewers 1

The offense dries up
Garza and Wily are not
The pitching answer

Game 73. Pirates 7, Brewers 3

With a six-run first
Pirates pile on Zach Davies
Crew quiet again

Game 74. Brewers 4, Pirates 3

Santana comes through
While Arcia golden gloves
The final grounder

Game 75. Brewers 4, Pirates 2

Behind Chase and Shaw
Crew earns a split of series
Still hanging in first

 



The Canning of Mr. Met

by James Finn Garner

With apologies (not really needed) to Robert W. Service

There are strange things done in a season’s run
.   By the characters ’round Citi Field
The yardbird gramps will loiter on ramps
.   And tell you to keep your eyes peeled.
The borough of Queens has staged horrible scenes
.   But the horriblest of them yet
Was a dark night in May, with the team put away,
.   We got flipped off by Mr. Met.

Now Mr. Met, let no one forget,
.   Has been around since the Amazin’s began.
The face of the team had a smile that beamed
.   Brighter than any real Gotham man.
So when miserable play, day after day,
.   Leaves the line twixt patience and torture blurred
It should be no surprise that even this guy
.   Is reduced to giving the bird.

The Brewers had bombed ol’ Jacob deGrom
.   And, heckled by some random slob,
Mr. Met let loose with a low-flying goose
.   And now is out of a job.
When you see him there, in the crowd in Times Square,
.   Taking snaps for tips with Iowa teens
With Elmo and Kermit, slow down and permit
.   Him to reflect on what might have been.

 

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