Browse all poems and songs in the 'Miami Marlins' Category

Fall of the House of All-Star Clerihews

Julio Teheran
Loves Duran Duran
But will take a paz
On Yaz.

Yoenis Cespedes
Likes watching “The Apprentice”.
“What I can’t figure out, man,
Is where they found a talking orangutan.”

Marcell Ozuna
Is the big kahuna
In Miami’s centerfield
By Red Groom’s carnival sculpture he’s almost concealed.

Dellin Betances
Took his chances
With a street vendor’s tamales
And is now very solly.


Home Run Derby Winner

by Stephen Jones

Giancarlo Stanton swings his bat
Like John Henry swung his hammer.
When he connects, sparks fly.

No small wonder, that no pitcher
Wants to face this Marlin batter.


All Hail Ichiro

by James Finn Garner

So many long years ago
Began spraying hits
And if it seems like it’s
Going to go on forever
(I mean, it never
Looks like he ages),
Remember the pages
Of record holders
Left to molder
When a young stud
Both lucky and good
Works to set a new mark
At the ball park.
In time a new hero
Will surpass Ichiro,
And the passage of time
Cruel and sublime
Will lose some of its sting
As we salute a new king.



by Stephen Jones

(A Nod to John D. MacDonald)


“Giancarlo Stanton, without any pity,
Coolly murdered a baseball — a line-drive
Home run screaming four hundred ninety.

“Some say it was heard in the next county.
It was later found in an unmarked grave.

“Officials do say: ‘No arrests have been made.'”


Don Mattingly

by Stephen Jones

Donnie Baseball is off to Miami–
Sunshine home of the Northeast retiree–
Where he’ll raise Marlins, a la Girardi,
On a budget one-third Dodgers’ salary.


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Copyright 2007 Bardball.