Perfect Timing
by Joyce Heiser
Twenty-first birthday
and daughter’s a White Sox fan.
Booze might help that pain.
Mets Financial Advice
by Patrick
From Wilpons sadness
ideas for help spring forward
Madoff bobbleheads
AL West 2011 Haiku Predictions
By Stuart Shea
LOS ANGELES ANGELS OF ANAHEIM
So Peter Bourjos
Is the fastest man around.
Can he steal first base?
OAKLAND ATHLETICS
A new sun rising
On the bay…change is coming
For Balfour or Wuertz.
SEATTLE MARINERS
How long can the M’s
Stick with Milton Bradley’s act
Til the game’s over?
TEXAS RANGERS
Is it a surprise
That the Rangers have acquired
A pitcher named Bush?
AL East 2011 Haiku Predictions
By Stuart Shea
BALTIMORE ORIOLES
Talented groundhogs
Trying to burrow through a
two-layer brick wall.
BOSTON RED SOX
Deep at every spot.
Not young at any of them,
Must win now or else.
NEW YORK YANKEES
E. Chavez is “back”!
Well, that’s a strange way to say
That he feels “healthy.”
TAMPA BAY RAYS
Damon? Ramirez?
It all depends what kind of
leadership you want.
TORONTO BLUE JAYS
Latinos can get
Good job opportunities
North of the border.
AL Central 2011 Haiku Predictions
By Stuart Shea
CHICAGO WHITE SOX
Will Morel mushroom
into a good third baseman
Or just become waste?
CLEVELAND INDIANS
Um…Jack Hannanan?
In the lineup? At third base?
It’s not April 1.
DETROIT TIGERS
The Tigers, a team
of 25 question marks.
A growl? A meow?
KANSAS CITY ROYALS
Ending up with Jeff
Francoeur…that’s a real bad day
At the rummage sale.
MINNESOTA TWINS
If he keeps winning,
Carl Pavano can look like
A porn star all year.
