Jason and the Golden Thong

by Hart Seely

On days when drives are flying long,
And pitchers wonder what’s gone wrong?
The Bronx winds sing this joyous song:
“Giambi’s in his golden thong!”

Each swing reveals Giambi’s might,
Each wince inspires his mates to fight,
They know too well his painful plight:
One ball hangs left, one ball hangs right.

He leads the veteran team attack,
True courage, he shall never lack!
He eyes the pitch, then takes his whack
As golden threads ascend his crack.

Then comes the time when life turns wrong,
When wins grow short, and losses long,
And Bronx winds sing their saddest song:
“Giambi’s lost his golden thong!”

Hart Seely is the author of the hilarious Mother Goose Goes to Washington, as well as Oh Holy Cow: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, newly released in a 15th-anniversary edition. He often hangs around the Yankee website, It is High, It is Far, It is….caught, offering tasteful and constructive comments to management and players alike.

Posted 5/21/08. 

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