Off Season, On the Bright Side

by Hilary Barta

Goodbye pitches and homers well struck
So long switch-hits and gnome-beards for luck
No more blasts, no more clout
That’s the last, final out
It’s a bitch–but there’s no more Joe Buck.

 


Published in Broadcasters, Houston Astros, Limerick, Los Angeles Dodgers, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | No Comments

Series Unction

by Stuart Shea

Everyone has theories
About why this World Series
Is packed with non-stop offense—

“The baseballs are slick
The pitchers can’t stick
Their nails into their surface.”

We know that these hitters
Don’t get the jitters
And can deal with sophisto defense—

They just loft the ball
Right over the wall
And make all the pitchers nerface.

 


Published in Houston Astros, Los Angeles Dodgers, Pure doggerel, Scandals, Stu Shea, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | No Comments

Invasion of the Astro Monsters

by Hilary Barta

Now back ‘neath the palm trees they meet
Bats blacked, baseballs scuffed, take your seat
With zombies and witches
And bombs hit off pitches
Will LA get a trick or a treat?

 


Published in Food, Houston Astros, Limerick, Los Angeles Dodgers | Link to this poem | No Comments

Classroom (at a Bar)

by Stephen Jones

Question of relativity:
Which came first —
The player or the ball?

Question of old history:
When did the strike zone
Become a judgement call?

(Note: Question #1 was tabled,
As a “discussion” was started
about the merits of juice …
And Question #2 was stumbled
Over by be-spectacled
Umpires, and after boos.)

 


Published in Fans, Food, Pure doggerel, Scandals, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | No Comments

Captain Nepotism

by Hilary Barta

Stupendous long blasts have been struck!
Tremendous big bats run amok!
The game has gone mad!
It’s shameless and bad!
Please end this at last! Dump Joe Buck!

 


Published in Broadcasters, Houston Astros, Limerick, Los Angeles Dodgers | Link to this poem | 5 Comments

Say It Is So, Joe

Roadtrip

Off Season, On the Bright Side

Series Unction

AL East

NL East

Extra Innings

AL Central

NL Central

Poems by Type

AL West

NL West

Heavy Hitters

Copyright 2007 Bardball.