Presidential Lox

by James Finn Garner

It’s tradition on Opening Day:
The Prez puts the first ball in play,
But with his miniscule mitts,
The Donald just quits
And tweets, “Baseball’s for losers anyway.”


Published in Ballparks, History, James Finn Garner, Limerick, Scandals, The Game Itself, Washington Nationals | Link to this poem | 3 Comments

Presidential Lox: 3 Comments

  1. James Finn Garner wrote,

    From Hilary Barta:

    He’s bossy, he’s rich, he’s a hawk
    But cross him, he’ll bitch and he’ll squawk
    Disgraceful, this POTUS
    Puts baseball on notice
    “Why toss the first pitch? I can balk!”

  2. James Finn Garner wrote,

    From Jim Siergey:

    It’s not that he wants to be rude
    Or act like a prig or a prude
    His reason to ditch
    Tossing out the first pitch
    Is cuz he can’t stand to be booed

  3. Hilary Barta wrote,


    Orange hairdo wind-blown in a swirl,
    Donnie stares down to home, here’s the hurl…
    With executive ordure,
    A wall on the border,
    Who cares that he throws like a girl?

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