Sgt. Pepper’s 2015 Forecast: “Joe Maddon, Joe Maddon!”

by James Finn Garner

For one hundred years, nothin’ but tears and “Wait til next year”
Nothing to do but hoist a few nine-dollar beers
What are the odds? Did we anger the gods?
I have one thing to say, that it’s okay:
JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON!

Epstein’s at work, trying to stock up the old farm
Call up sure things, they bring nothing, nothing but harm

.      Try to fix the park, the fanbase screams
.      Just try to find new money streams
.      Rebuild the bleachers?  They’re still torn down!
.      Cards fans and rats all over town

Not much to say ‘bout Felix Pie, another “sure bet.”
Itzuris and Guzman — what’s the use, man?  One more null set.
Calling Marmol to save’s like digging your grave
I have one thing to say, that it’s okay:
JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON!

.      But Castro, Alcantara and Baez
.      Might be as good as Epstein says
.      Jorge Soler’s a beast, and — WOW!
.      John Lester’s here? Please shoot me now!

Try to temper hope, not be a dope, but it’s getting hard
Everyone’s cryin’ to see Kris Bryant in the ballyard
Reverse the Curse? We couldn’t get worse.
There’s just one thing to say, we’ve made our play:
JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON!
JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON!
JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON, JOE MADDON!

 

 


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