The Rally Thong Song

by James Finn Garner

Everybody sing a song
to celebrate the rally thong!

From Castro to the Tenderloin
A winning feeling in the groin!

Spangly rhinestones front and rear
Cup everything Gints fans hold dear.

Red silk fabric will raise no rash
When legging out an outfield smash

And blocks out the winter chill
In the field and on the hill.

From style maven Aubrey Huff
It’s better than going in the buff.

To get em stoked, no better way
In lovely “Babylon by the Bay.”

But in Dallas, brother, have a care.
Only strippers wear ’em there.

They’ll jail your ass, without quarrel,
for corrupting public morals.

Play it safe, don’t be too hasty,
Better pack your rally pasties.


Published in Pure doggerel, San Francisco Giants, Texas Rangers | Link to this poem | No Comments

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