Why Be Normal?

by James Finn Garner

Dock Ellis dropping LSD
Yankee pitchers swapping keys
The Bird and Bill Lee spacing out
The Babe battling the clap and gout

While these actions might be reckless,
Modern players seem so feckless,
Corporate suits with all the spice
Of a Pepsi Lite with lime, no ice.

I want to bellow: “Why be normal?
“Show some life! Don’t be so formal!”
It’s more fun to watch Lee Van Cleef
Than cheer for Wally without the Beave.


Published in Fans, History, James Finn Garner, Players, Pure doggerel, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | 2 Comments

Why Be Normal?: 2 Comments

  1. Bob wrote,

    Lee van Cleef!
    With the Philadelphia Phillies, circa 1979, the mustached Steve Carlton looks JUST LIKE LEE VAN CLEEF.

  2. Hilary Barta wrote,

    All those players were real, unrehearsed
    They made hay, they would feel, often cursed
    They were heroes, unvarnished
    Not those zeroes, untarnished,
    Who today in the deal are well versed.

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