Archive for May, 2007
Bonds of Irony
by Stu Shea
Whitey Ford and Willie Mays,
Lew Burdette and Elroy Face,
Bunning, Stargell, Wynn, and Rose,
Gaylord Perry, goodness knows!
Famous players, heroes all,
Most of them are in the Hall.
Where’s the “throw the bums out” call
Since they used speed, or scuffed the ball?
***
When Barry Bonds breaks Aaron’s mark,
Skeletons will fill the park.
Bud will lie to us again
About how much he knew, and when.
Fans will throw their hands up high
And try to find a reason why
They ought to go to baseball games
And see stars besmirch their own names.
Mike MacDougal
by Stu Shea
The Royals were frugal
And traded Mike MacDougal.
He turns ballgames into kugel.
Shut Up and Pitch Better
By Doug White
There once was a pitcher named Snell
Who didn’t throw particularly well.
When he hung a curve too high,
David Ross let it fly,
Then the hurler gave the poor ballpark hell.
On The Cubs’ Bullpen
by Stu Shea
Some folks take a pill for relief,
But Piniella’s relief
Makes him feel like a pill.
When Howry and Eyre let it loose,
Sweet Lou turns chartreuse
When he looks toward the hill.
It’s just a bad Ohman to see
The rookie, Cherry,
Looking in for the sign.
They’re going from bad to Wuertz,
And watching them hurts
With the game on the line.
Pirates’ Lament
By Stu Shea
The high seas ain’t what they used to be.
We used to have Willie,
And Bobby Clemente,
And Bobby Bo, Andy, Jim Leyland, and Barry.
Now we have Nady,
And Tom Gorzelanny.
