Browse all poems and songs in the 'Food' Category


MLB All-Refrigerator Team

by James Finn Garner

1B  Lefty Herring
2B  Rabbit Maranville
SS  Oyster Burns
3B  Joe Bean
LF  Buttercup Dickerson
CF  Milky Cabrera
RF  Ice Box Chamberlain
C   Yam Yaryan
LHP  William Peppers, Chick Smith
RHP  Sweetbread Bailey, Pete Hamm
MGR  Rawmeat Rogers

 



Random Drug Pests

By Hilary Barta

Arrieta keeps throwing the heat
Talking heads say they know he’s a cheat
“Jake has got to be juiced.”
“Guys this hot get a boost.”
They’ll be fed, and it’s crow they will eat.

 

If you love limericks like every red-blooded American, you need to check out Hilary’s movie-and-pop-culture limerick site, LimerWrecks, every day.



Panda Fan’s Lament

by the Village Elliott

As Giants’ Panda fan since his birth,
Loved the way Pablo played full of mirth–
Ate from both sides of plate,
Now he can’t hit his weight,
Sad he’s unfit to play with full girth.

After the Giants got Panda’s best,
The Red Sox will pay for the rest.
Jints dodged bullet by not
Matching loot Panda got.
Sox fans moan, Giants’ faithful feel blessed.

 



Philly’s High-Cheesesteak

by Stephen Jones

Phillies’ fan faithful usually
Don’t have much to cheer about,
But thank you Vince Velasquez
For 16 Ks and a shutout.

(Philly blanked San Diego —
It was 3-0 —
And turned the Padres nosh
Into a hero.)

 



Waisting One

by Michael X. Ferraro

Pablo wanted to belt the ball
So he took a prodigious hack.
But to his dismay, Sandoval’s belt
Is the thing not coming back.

 

For the video of this wardrobe malfunction, click here.

Michael’s hilarious football book Circus Catch is available from Amazon now.

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Copyright 2007 Bardball.