Has become famos
As catcher for the Nats–
Must be the way that he squats.
Likes to golf indoors.
As dangerous as his home gets,
His kids have learned to wear helmets.
When his mind meanders
Imagines himself in toque, cape and shorts
Savior of the Great White North.
Is such a fussy eater
On every dinner date
He asks an ump to brush his plate.
by Stu Shea
The harpies harp on Harper
They say he’s immature
I’ll take him and his moods
Whether pure, poor, or manure.
I seen some pitchers scared of my bat
Paint the corners, standing pat
What about them “unwritten rules”?
Pitch me straight and you’ll get schooled
Oh baby, that’s hard to change
I can’t tell them how to pitch
High inside, low away
Sooner or later, I’ll crush that bitch
Walk on, walk on, walk on, walk on . . .
by the Village Elliott
This year’s league MVPs have been won
By Bryce Harper and Josh Donaldson.
Bryce was unanimous,
Though Nats missed playoff bus,
While Josh powered the Jays’ playoff run.