Browse all poems and songs in the 'Seattle Mariners' Category

American League West 2014 Spring Training Haiku

By Stuart Shea

An Appel a day
Would keep the losses away
But he’s not yet ripe.

Ask A. Moreno–
Trout fishing in Cali
Can be expensive.

Free and well-favored,
No-names and others’ castoffs
Find their own success.

East coast import
Finds rain not to his liking
Even under roof.

Wash likes sac bunting.
His fellow skippers are glad
To accept the out.


The Biogenesis All-Star Squad

By Stuart Shea

Bartolo Colon,
Big and round,
Is on the mound.

Francisco Cervelli,
A-Rod’s teammate,
Is behind the plate.

Jesus Montero
Will suit up at first,
Though his bat is the worst.

Jhonny Peralta
Has a bat to be reckoned,
And we’ll move him to second.

To play at short,
The Padres’ rara,
Everth Cabrera.

At third base, of course,
With broken-down bod,

Fernando Martinez
Is playing left field,
With a .240 yield.

Melky Cabrera
Will hold down center–
He’s just a renter.

Nelson Cruz
Is out there in right…
At least for tonight.


Halfway-Point Haiku

by D. Bruce Brown

AL East
A nation believes
That their guys can win it all
History says no

Fighting a drab park
Evan isn’t an All-Star?
Our starters will shine

Is Davis for real?
His weight room feats are unreal
The bullpen will tell

New York
An EMT’s dream
But Girardi knows winning
How is Cano’s knee?

Can we go from first
To last in the same season?
The rest must collapse

AL West
Cespedes homers
Billy Beane is a genius
Damn!  Who ARE these guys?

So very close twice
Making believers of fans
If only Nolan could pitch

Los Angeles (AoA)
Tons of star power
Swept at home by the Astros
What is going on?

In obscurity
They perform for loyal fans
Wait!  Ichiro’s where?

Switching leagues might help
Two thousand and five was great
But so long ago

AL Central
Pitching’s no problem
The best hitter in baseball
These cats have a bite!

Once given for dead
With lectures from Chris Perez
Francona’s now boss

Kansas City
AL’s small market
Yet they have players to watch
Brett’s in the dugout

Trying to build stars
Is hard when your DH is Plouffe
Mauer can still hit

South Siders are glum
Sale should have been MVP
Git up!  Git up!  Stretch!

D. Bruce Brown has posted daily trivia questions for Horsehide Trivia since 1997.  He is also the president of the Bob Davids chapter of SABR.

A Poetic Crime, Clerihew and Simple (All-Star Edition)

by James Finn Garner

We live in the era
Of Mariano Rivera,
Which will serve to measure historic flow:
Dates will henceforth be noted either BMo or AMo (Before or After Mo).

Edwin Encarnacion
Handles his first base stacion
With skill and bravado
That is the toast of Canado.

Hernandez (Felix)
Somewhere in his DNA’s double helix
Has a velocity gene,
Thus his fastball is never seen.

Hiroshi Iwakuma,
According to ruma,
Pitches well in the state of Washington,
But I’m in bed before their games are done.


2013 AL West Prediction Haiku

By Stuart Shea

Welcome to the league!
You youngsters enjoy yourselves
As you lose each day

Trout Fishing in spring…
Or Prince Albert in a can?
Is Ryan Mad, son?

Bartolo Colon
Is still suspended. So…more
food in the clubhouse?

Raul Ibanez
Played for Seattle during
Bill Clinton’s first term

Replacing Josh H.
With Martin and Gentry? That’s
Carob for dessert


AL East

NL East

Extra Innings

AL Central

NL Central

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AL West

NL West

Heavy Hitters

Copyright 2007 Bardball.