Browse all poems and songs in the 'Pure doggerel' Category


Hiring (and Firing) From Within

by Stuart Shea

The Marlins hired a ‘suit’
To skipper their club–
And he’s as bright as a summer tanager.

But when his time runs out,
The angry fans will shout,
“Fire the Middle Manager!”

 



What To Do, Brew Crew?

By Stuart Shea

The team wasn’t good
Before Lucroy went down.
Then they fired the skipper
In hopes of a rebound.
But it’s all in vain,
It’s rebuild time again,
Let’s burn the whole thing to the ground.

Trade Garza, Segura,
Ramirez, and Lind,
And think about Braun,
If a deal’s in the wind.
But just don’t deal Scooter,
There ain’t no one cuter,
And as far as we know, he ain’t sinned.

 



Hope Inflates Eternal

by Susan Petrone

Tribe fans have had little reason
To feel hopeful for their team this season.
But when Kluber pitches great,
Hope is like a baseball, it can’t deflate.

 

Susan owns and operates the Indians website, It’s Pronounced Lajaway, and is the author of the new novel Throw Like a Woman.

 



Bleachers Open for Business

by James Finn Garner

Chicago is known for its class
So give that girl in the bleachers a pass
You might’ve thought the cap rubbed her ass
But she’s the new Cubs mascot “Bum Lass”.

 



Yadi

by Alan P. Rudy

With apologies to Joyce, but not Billy, Kilmer

I think that I shall never see,
A poem lovely as Yadi.

Yadi whose potent arm at rest,
Ceases the runner’s speedy best;

Yadi who chooses signs all day,
Leaving the hitter’s bats astray;

Yadi whose knees through wear and tear,
May platoon at first in late career;

Upon whose neck ink is lain;
And forearm rose he has attained.

Doggerel’s made by fools like me,
But Yadi amazes all who see.

 

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