By Stuart Shea
Don’t mean nothin’ how much he stanks–
Ventura’s gonna keep on using John Danks.
Don’t even matter how much he tanks,
Or politely mutters “Please” and “Thanks.”
Far be it from me to pull any ranks,
Or attack the clubhouse with guns and shanks,
Or call the sports talk shows pullin’ pranks,
But they’ve gotta have somebody better than Danks.
by Jim Siergey
Is Starlin out tonight?
Is his future cloudy or bright?
Cubs think that he’s way overdue
Fans’ hopes are all high
They see that pie in the sky
Cubs like Baez and Russell, too
We all know the choice is a hard one
Shortstop’s a crowded avenue
He’s still here, some ask “Why?”
His batting average once was high
But now it’s disappearing from view
And Joe doesn’t have eyes for you
So, is Starlin out tonight?
Will Adam or Javy be right?
Will he no longer wear Cubbie Blue?
By Stu Shea
Madison Bumgarner doesn’t much care
For hitters who flip their bats into the air.
He’ll rip you a new one, buzz you inside,
Scream at you after retiring the side.
And he doesn’t care if you’re black or you’re white,
Latino or Asian…he’s up for a fight.
I have just one question to ask of you all–
Who appointed him guard of the castle of ball?
by James Finn Garner
For all the effort
The October result’s
The entire story
A franchise reborn
Butts in the seats
Strong arms and bats–
Some for the ages!–
Might end up mere stats
On old dusty pages
Without a ring
You’re as good as dead
When the Pizza King
Shouts, “Off with his head!”
by Stephen Jones
Tulowitski and Price–
Big roll of the dice.
We go all mental,
This move’s a rental.
Has to prove its worth
Is more than
Just a wildcard berth.