Time-Saving Seventh-Inning Anthem

by Ron Kaplan

Buy me some peanuts.
I don’t care.
Let us root root for the laundry;
If they don’t win, meh.
For it’s two strikes, you’re out.
The end.

(Time of game: 2:10)

 

Ron Kaplan operates the very literate website Ron Kaplan’s Baseball Bookshelf and is the author of 501 Baseball Books Fans Must Read Before They Die.


Published in Fans, Food, Free Verse, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | 1 Comment

Well, Shucks

by R.J. Lesch

Here’s Bryan Price, his Reds down on their luck.
With injuries his players have been hit.
As manager, he sure would like to duck
His duties as a spokesman, and to sit

upon the news of who could play, and tuck
away the players who could not. But it
is not an option nowadays. No truck
is had with silence on such things. To wit,

reporters and their readers want to pluck
from every minute’s stream the latest bit
of news. And if it hurts the team? Tough. Suck
it up. And Reds’ opponents benefit.

I guess he thinks he’d had enough with schmucks.
And so Price vents, and Rosecrans “tsks” and clucks.

 


Published in Cincinnati Reds, Management, Scandals | Link to this poem | No Comments

Utley’s Coroner

by Michael X. Ferraro

Chase Utley gets plunked all the time.
Sometimes he leans in, like a mime.
But Matt Harvey drilled hard,
Because Chase took him yard.
Does Baseball not think this a crime?

 

Chase Utley led the league in HBP three years running, from 2007-9. He has also homered so often to the right field porch at Citi Field, the Mets announcers have christened it “Utley’s Corner.”

Michael X. Ferraro is a writer and Phillies fan trapped in Los Angeles. His latest book is the satirical sports novel, Circus Catch.


Published in Limerick, New York Mets, Philadelphia Phillies, Players, Scandals, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | No Comments

Alex Rios’ April

By Stuart Shea

Signed to a deal by the Royals–
A chance to retighten my coils.

Given an everyday job,
Replacing that Aoki slob.

Drilled by a rookie in April–
Knocked me on my ass like a vape will.

Out for six to eight weeks,
A delight to those analyst geeks.

 


Published in Fans, Kansas City Royals, Players, Pure doggerel, Stu Shea, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | No Comments

Catastrophe in Cleveland

By Susan Petrone

Brantley’s back, Yan Gomes’ knee,
And now Carrasco’s face.
A week into the season,
The curse runs fast apace.

 

Susan Petrone’s new novel is Throw Like a Woman. She blogs frequently about the Tribe at the website It’s Pronounced Lajaway.


Published in Cleveland Indians, History, Players, Pure doggerel, The Game Itself | Link to this poem | No Comments

Alex Rios’ April

Catastrophe in Cleveland

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