By Hugh Encrye
Played the “unwritten rules” right,
Grooved the Captain a pitch to hit,
Then found himself in a world of trouble.
The greatest hitter of our era.
Pitch the pill behind his back
And still he’ll give that ball a whack.
Didn’t hit one out,
But a double and a triple
by Hugh Manatee
Is feeling hinky
And regrets his wish
For bottomless Minnesota hot dish.
Ended the suspense:
He scares both adults and kids
Cuz he was tragically born without eyelids.
Will take his chances,
Gird up his junk-a
And take a dive into Lake Minnetonka.
Is a 14-time All-Star repeater
And, if we trust the announcers,
Also invented sliced bread, the Internet and trousers.
Has got nothing to lose.
Though Selig may wince,
He’s gonna show up at the game dressed as Prince
by Michael X. Ferraro
There is no base coach at second.
Otherwise, Kipnis may’ve reckoned
that Jeter’s feigned catch was deceit
to get him to slide on his seat.
But doubled off first, he got burned
with a bitter life lesson learned:
Always keep your eye on the ball–
Not the guy who’s stamped for the Hall.
Here’s a video of Derek Jeter’s play at second that confused Jason Kipnis on Monday. Heh heh.
by Hart Seely
A warm, sunny day.
A sea food buffet.
A fling in the hay.
Solarte … in May.
A song out of tune.
Street crime in Rangoon.
A nightmare swoon.
Solarte … in June.
A routine pop fly.
A darkening sky.
A long, anguished sigh.
Solarte … July?
Solarte … good-bye.
Hart Seely is the ringmaster of one of the funniest baseball blogs around, It is High, It is Far, It is … Caught.
by Stephen Jones
David Ortiz saves his best for history -
The long, fierce Red Sox/Yankee rivalry -
And always the nemesis of Pinstripes,
He did it again just last Sunday night.
In the third he smacked a 3-run homer
And grinned It’s good to be a power hitter
As he beat up Chase Whitley, rookie pitcher,
With a detonation to Yankee right-center.
He’s a hulking figure at the plate,
But he and Cooperstown have a date.
Is Ortiz Marvel’s newest Avenger?
On newsstands now . . . The Pinstripe Tormentor.