Lance Says a Little A-Rod Prayer
by David Bellel
The moment you shoot up,
Before you put on your makeup,
I say a little prayer for you.
While Cameron combs your hair, now,
And wondering what bling to wear, now,
I say a little prayer for you.
Forever, forever,
You’ll stay at 599
And I will hate you
Forever, forever,
We’ll watch your decline,
Oh, how I’ll hate you
Together, together,
That’s how it must be
We’re stuck for seven more years with you,
Truly a Yankee tragedy for we.
You can find more of David’s Yankee screeds at his blog, Pseudo-Intellectualism.
Chamberlain, That’s He
by David Bellel
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Who is the man whose bad tosses will bring a loss?
Chamberlain, that’s he!
Who will surely fold when your team needs a hold?
Chamberlain, that’s he!
For he isn’t as proud of his name you see,
As a Sparky, Goose, or a Mo could be.
Who is the man that blows a lead every time he can?
Chamberlain, that’s he!
C-H-AMBER-L-A-I-N spells Chamberlain
Proud of all the Indian blood that’s in he;
Many a man can say a word agin he.
C-H-AMBER-L-A-I-N, you see,
Is a name that shame is usually been connected with,
Chamberlain, that’s he!
C-H-AMBER-L-A-I-N spells Chamberlain
Proud of all the Indian blood that’s in he;
Many a man can say a word agin he.
C-H-AMBER-L-A-I-N, you see,
Is a name that shame is usually been connected with,
Chamberlain, that’s he!
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The sharp-eyed might recognize Harrigan here as one of the cast members of “The Wizard of OZ”.
David posts his thoughts on the Yankees and urban education at his blog Pseudo-Intellectualism.
Posted 7/16/2010
Mets Fans’ Sad Lexicon
by Ron Kaplan
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With apologies to Franklin Pierce Adams on the 100th anniversary of his original poem
These are the saddest words Mets fans could hear:
Ollie (Martinez) Perez.
Walking the enemy year after year:
Ollie (Martinez) Perez.
Taking his time as he misses his pitches,
Giving up homers to those sons of bitches,
All during which we don’t know where his brain is:
Ollie (Martinez) Perez.
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Ron Kaplan is the features and sports editor of a New Jersey newspaper, and also runs Ron Kaplan’s Baseball Bookshelf, which is a must-read.
Posted 7/12/10
Feeling Good: Birds Flying Low
by David Bellel
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Birds flying low, you know how I feel,
Three-hit Cano, you know how I feel,
Ten wins in a row, you know how I feel,
It’s another o-misplay
It’s a crucial CC K
It’s a Rivera save
For Yanks,
And I’m feeling good.
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Check out David’s Yankee blog, Pseudo-Intellectualism.
Posted 6/30/10
Happy Halladay
by David Bellel
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Happy Halladay, happy Halladay
While the homer balls keep soaring,
May your ev’ry wish come true.
Happy Halladay, happy Halladay
May the hitless Phils keep bringing
Happy Halladays to you.
Come To Halladay Inn.
If you’re burdened down with groin pulls
If your catchers are wearing thin
Park your load with the trainer
And come to Halladay Inn.
If the lack of bench affects you
Like a squeaky violin
Kick some Phillie butt and then strut
And come to Halladay Inn.
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You can keep up with David on his blog, Pseudo-Intellectualism.
Posted 6/18/10
