By Stuart Shea
Darin Ruf ain’t got the stuff,
And Ryan Howard’s no longer powered.
Ben Revere has value unclear,
And there’s little regard fo’ Antonio Bastardo.
Pity Dominic Brown, whose average is down,
And Cody Asche, who is far from flashy.
Even Cliff Lee and Carlos Ruiz
Are suffering from the same disease.
So who’s the chiff of this team of stiffs?
Ruben Ameero, who seems like a zero.
by Hugh Briss
Must be throwing fits. He’s
The top vote-getter among NL jocks,
Yet plays for a bottom-feeder like the Rox.
Walks around touching
Each and every light switch
Cuz his OCD is just a bitch.
That’s a big favor to owe.
You’ll have to deliver, by gawd,
Before they uncover Chicago’s election fraud.
Needs a course in geography.
Instead of Minnesota,
He booked a flight to North Dakota.
Smooth move, eh?
Spend the week away from Houston,
Maybe get some fishing done.
by Tom Martin (@brew_haiku)
Game 90. #Phillies 3 #Brewers 2
It’s a weird feeling
Losing more games than winning
Small shades of last year…
Game 91. #Phillies 7 #Brewers 5 (in 4th inning)
Overbay Grand Slam
Seems like a long time ago
Pitching is shaky.
Game 91. #Phillies 9 #Brewers 5 (in 5th inning)
Good to see you in the game
Please, no more runs though!
Game 92. #Phillies 4 #Brewers 1
Let’s see, we have lost
4 straight and 8 out of 9
Time for slide to end.
Game 93. #Phillies 9 #Brewers 1
That sinking feeling
Both game and Division leads
Tom Martin writes haiku for every single Brewer game. Follow him on Twitter @brew_haiku.
by Stuart Shea
Upton up and down?
Uggla ugly or upward?
Freddie a Free Man?
Now that everyone
Has left the stadium, the
Rebuild can begin.
A farewell to arms—
No Harvey, no Mejia?
And one fat Colon.
Welcome, Matt Williams!
Now that you’re here, it’s assumed
You’ll win right away.
Old men, broken down,
Troll the green fields of the town,
Searching for what’s gone.