The Mark McGwire Limericks of Shame
by James Finn Garner
So the news comes that Mark McGwire
On the subject of juice was a liar.
Plus, it’s a good bet
That water is wet
And it hurts to grab something on fire.
“I’m not here to talk ’bout the past,”
Mark blurted to Congress so fast,
Whatever the pride
He had that day died
To give a defense so half-assed.
To get a job working for Tony,
Mark had to confess his baloney.
He was juiced to the ears
The homer-soaked years,
A fame-drunk, preposterous phony.
To get in the Cooperstown Hall,
McGwire will wait for his call
Til Hell freezes over,
The sea swallows Dover,
And Sammy parleys like Bill Engvall.
Posted 8/29/10
Boo Hoo Lou
by Hilary Barta
So sad about “Sweet Lou” Piniella,
A stand-up and Hall of Fame fella.
The Cubs made him cry
While saying goodbye
By playing their way to the cella.
Hilary Barta is a lifelong Cubs fan, award-winning comic illustrator, and owner of the terrific site, LimerWrecks.
The Legend of the Racing Pierogi
by James Finn Garner
.
An opinionated pierogi
(Not bratwurst, donut or hoagie)
Got canned by the Bucs,
Who then looked liked schmucks.
He’s back racing — that doughy rogue, he!
.
For background on this newsworthy event, click here.
Posted 7/7/2010
Chicago Still Home of the Blues
by Hilary Barta
.
Chicago is singing the blues
The Cubbies continue to lose
Their hitting’s abysmal
The season looks dismal
Don’t stop any presses, not news
.
Famed comic-book artist Hilary Barta also runs the site Limerwrecks, with daily limericks posts about comics, film noir, monster movies, and other pop culture items.
Posted 6/15/2010
Ace Not So High
by Jim Siergey
.
The ace on the White Sox, Mark Buehrle
Now hurls like T.V.’s Mr. Furley
Goes into his kick
Then throws like he’s sick
And exits the game rather early.
.
Jim Siergey is the author of the Cubs’ sci-fi epic, If They Did It. You can see his illustrations and other work at his website here.
Posted 6/8/10
