Browse all poems and songs in the 'Players' Category


Frank Thomas

by James Finn Garner

A Ferrari swing
In a Hummer body

A lumbering frame
On limber ankles

A clean blood test
In a filthy era

The Big Hurt on the field
The big heart in the speech

Paying the price
Of small-market loyalty
But it’s oh so nice
To be Cooperstown royalty

 



Unctuous Aiken Poem

By Stuart Shea

Houston drafted a pitcher named Aiken
Then said he was damaged, though his elbow ain’t achin’.
No one agreed on appropriate bacon,
Makin’ non-achin’ Aiken’s a special deal-breakin’.

 



Springertime in Houston

By Stuart Shea

This George Springer–
A real humdinger,
From-the-heels swinger,
Highlight bringer,
Bad-pitch stinger,
But for all we know
He’s not much of a singer.



Deep Thoughts (Inner Monologue of a Gopherball)

by Michael X. Ferraro

Giancarlo, when I approached,
Via soft-serve toss of a coach
I foolishly said, “Let’s be friends!”
But instead I now have the bends.

As I rocket o’er Target Field,
McCutcheon gasps and Gordon squealed.
My path now is parabolic
Forget ‘roids– are you bionic?

Mr. Stanton, I hold no grudge.
I’m a baseball, not a judge.
The fans swoon like they’ve seen Kirby
as I leave this Home Run Derby.



All-Star Clerihews #3

By Hugh Encrye

Adam Wainwright
Played the “unwritten rules” right,
Grooved the Captain a pitch to hit,
Then found himself in a world of trouble.

Miguel Cabrera
The greatest hitter of our era.
Pitch the pill behind his back
And still he’ll give that ball a whack.

Mike Trout
Didn’t hit one out,
But a double and a triple
Ain’t kibble.

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