Browse all poems and songs in the 'Baltimore Orioles' Category


All-Star Clerihews #2

by Hugh Manatee

Zach Greinke
Is feeling hinky
And regrets his wish
For bottomless Minnesota hot dish.

Hunter Pence
Ended the suspense:
He scares both adults and kids
Cuz he was tragically born without eyelids.

Dellin Betances
Will take his chances,
Gird up his junk-a
And take a dive into Lake Minnetonka.

Derek Jeter
Is a 14-time All-Star repeater
And, if we trust the announcers,
Also invented sliced bread, the Internet and trousers.

Nelson Cruz
Has got nothing to lose.
Though Selig may wince,
He’s gonna show up at the game dressed as Prince



Jake in June

By Stuart Shea

Freed from the Oriole Way
Was Jake Arrietay
Came to Chicago to play
Did Jake Arrietay.
Mowed down hitters all day
Did Jake Arrietay
With a beard of sunburned hay
Did Jake Arrietay.



The American League East (So Far)

by Stephen Jones

The American League East
Is a fratricidal beast.
It seems no team alone
Is sure to take the throne.
Instead, each league brother
Goes after one another.

I may be no betting man,
But I can see a future-scan:
It may just end up being,
After all the smoke is clearing,
That on a September morning
It will be the “last team standing.”

 



American League East 2014 Spring Training Haiku

By Stuart Shea

BLUE JAYS
Like other Canucks,
Jays fly south to Florida
But must return soon.

ORIOLES
“Is his knee healed up?”
What about the pitching? The–
“Is his knee healed up?”

RAYS
Wil Myers lead off?
Wil he be a new Joe D?
Wil success spoil him?

RED SOX
A bee swarm hovers,
Scaring off the ballplayers.
Nature owns nature.

YANKEES
The old men dream on,
Echoes of glory cascade
In crisp March sunshine.

 



From a Central Division Fan Who Hadn’t Been Paying Much Attention

by James Finn Garner

What th’ — BOSTON won the East?
Soaring up to best from least?
The experts’ toe tags read “Deceased”
But New York’s competitiveness ceased,
Baltimore’s upward path was greased.
Bet big on the Jays? You’re fleeced.
Of seafood the Carmines made a feast,
Muzzling that Tampa beast.
My faith is shaken — oh, call a priest!
I can’t believe they won the East!

 

AL East

NL East

Extra Innings

AL Central

NL Central

Poems by Type

AL West

NL West

Heavy Hitters

Copyright 2007 Bardball.