by Jim Siergey
He was a six-foot man
In a five-six frame
His unusual physique
Was his nickname
He hustled and he hit
And he ran like heck
An eternal fan favorite
Was little “No Neck.”
by the Village Elliott
When promoting men, Napoleon stuck
With this principle, “I look for luck.”
He would not buck the odds
And offend Baseball Gods
Shutting down Strasburg like a dumb schmuck.
Nats seem clueless and snake bit to me
Since the Strasburg Shut-Down travesty;
‘Fourteen’s Playoff Game Two:
Belt’s home run “lucky,” too;
Papelbon trade upset chemistry.
Dusty Baker will manage D.C.
Buddy’s tenure with Nats not to be;
Did Nats react to claim,
That “Black” in Bud’s last name,
Ain’t what league meant by diversity?
Seems like Dusty’s a bit snake bit, too,
Since Jints Series Game Six in ‘Ought Two,
His Cubs sure got jiggley
Post-Bartman in Wrigley,
Posey’s Granny bid his Reds adieu . . .
Months after our softball season’s through,
Pitcher our team beat still had no clue.
“Schedule and your team suck,
Only beat us by luck!”
“Yeah, we’re lucky we were playing you.”
by R.J. Lesch
The books must balance, so accountants say.
For every credit on the books, we must
Record a debit. Bills come in; we pay
Them off and write it down. In baseball, just
The same is true. A hit is chalked up to
The hitter and the pitcher both. A game
Won by my team must be a loss for you.
If we give credit, so we must give blame.
For every Thomson, Branca there must be.
For Mazeroski, Terry. Wilson, Buck.
Gordon and Familia, recently.
Then Hosmer, Duda. Perez, Matz. Tough luck.
The calculus of baseball can be cold,
But books must balance, once the tale is told.
by the Village Elliott
“What good is good pitching
If defense is porous?”
Reprise of the bitching
Amazin’ Mets Chorus.
Mets team defense a drag?
Another costly error?
Down-daubered Roger Craig
Lost 20 both years there.
This Series played a fright
No way the Mets survive
From Cespedes to Wright,
First inning through Game Five.
I tip my cap to Royals
Returning to the dance
The Instant Karmic spoils
They seized on second chance.
When Cespedes misplays
First ball, first run Mets yield–
Say, hey, ain’t Willie Mays,
Back playing center field.
Mad dash of Escobar
Redeemed slothful Gordon,
When Hosmer ties the score
Could sense the Royals had won.
Last year they lost to Jints
Panik starts a double.
Duda’s wild throw hints
It’s Mets who are in trouble.
The Royals deserve the crown
They won it fair and square,
Reversed their Dauber-down,
To earn the winners’ share.
by Sara Davis Buechner