Browse all poems and songs in the 'Toronto Blue Jays' Category


American League East 2014 Spring Training Haiku

By Stuart Shea

BLUE JAYS
Like other Canucks,
Jays fly south to Florida
But must return soon.

ORIOLES
“Is his knee healed up?”
What about the pitching? The–
“Is his knee healed up?”

RAYS
Wil Myers lead off?
Wil he be a new Joe D?
Wil success spoil him?

RED SOX
A bee swarm hovers,
Scaring off the ballplayers.
Nature owns nature.

YANKEES
The old men dream on,
Echoes of glory cascade
In crisp March sunshine.

 



From a Central Division Fan Who Hadn’t Been Paying Much Attention

by James Finn Garner

What th’ — BOSTON won the East?
Soaring up to best from least?
The experts’ toe tags read “Deceased”
But New York’s competitiveness ceased,
Baltimore’s upward path was greased.
Bet big on the Jays? You’re fleeced.
Of seafood the Carmines made a feast,
Muzzling that Tampa beast.
My faith is shaken — oh, call a priest!
I can’t believe they won the East!

 



The Biogenesis All-Star Squad

By Stuart Shea

Bartolo Colon,
Big and round,
Is on the mound.

Francisco Cervelli,
A-Rod’s teammate,
Is behind the plate.

Jesus Montero
Will suit up at first,
Though his bat is the worst.

Jhonny Peralta
Has a bat to be reckoned,
And we’ll move him to second.

To play at short,
The Padres’ rara,
Everth Cabrera.

At third base, of course,
With broken-down bod,
A-Rod.

Fernando Martinez
Is playing left field,
With a .240 yield.

Melky Cabrera
Will hold down center–
He’s just a renter.

Nelson Cruz
Is out there in right…
At least for tonight.

 



Halfway-Point Haiku

by D. Bruce Brown

AL East
Boston
A nation believes
That their guys can win it all
History says no

Tampa
Fighting a drab park
Evan isn’t an All-Star?
Our starters will shine

Baltimore
Is Davis for real?
His weight room feats are unreal
The bullpen will tell

New York
An EMT’s dream
But Girardi knows winning
How is Cano’s knee?

Toronto
Can we go from first
To last in the same season?
The rest must collapse

AL West
Oakland
Cespedes homers
Billy Beane is a genius
Damn!  Who ARE these guys?

Texas
So very close twice
Making believers of fans
If only Nolan could pitch

Los Angeles (AoA)
Tons of star power
Swept at home by the Astros
What is going on?

Seattle
In obscurity
They perform for loyal fans
Wait!  Ichiro’s where?

Houston
Switching leagues might help
Two thousand and five was great
But so long ago

AL Central
Detroit
Pitching’s no problem
The best hitter in baseball
These cats have a bite!

Cleveland
Once given for dead
With lectures from Chris Perez
Francona’s now boss

Kansas City
AL’s small market
Yet they have players to watch
Brett’s in the dugout

Minnesota
Trying to build stars
Is hard when your DH is Plouffe
Mauer can still hit

Chicago
South Siders are glum
Sale should have been MVP
Git up!  Git up!  Stretch!

D. Bruce Brown has posted daily trivia questions for Horsehide Trivia since 1997.  He is also the president of the Bob Davids chapter of SABR.



A Poetic Crime, Clerihew and Simple (All-Star Edition)

by James Finn Garner

We live in the era
Of Mariano Rivera,
Which will serve to measure historic flow:
Dates will henceforth be noted either BMo or AMo (Before or After Mo).

Edwin Encarnacion
Handles his first base stacion
With skill and bravado
That is the toast of Canado.

Hernandez (Felix)
Somewhere in his DNA’s double helix
Has a velocity gene,
Thus his fastball is never seen.

Hiroshi Iwakuma,
According to ruma,
Pitches well in the state of Washington,
But I’m in bed before their games are done.

 

AL East

NL East

Extra Innings

AL Central

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AL West

NL West

Heavy Hitters

Copyright 2007 Bardball.