by Stephen Jones
Hey, don’t count them out —
The Yankees just clout
Toronto’s first-place Blue Jays.
It’s the first time this season
They swept the opposition,
And next up, it’s the Devil Rays.
Yeah, there’s not much time left —
And it’s a hard nut to crack —
But reality’s something you check
Outside the stadium gate.
Has become famos
As catcher for the Nats–
Must be the way that he squats.
Likes to golf indoors.
As dangerous as his home gets,
His kids have learned to wear helmets.
When his mind meanders
Imagines himself in toque, cape and shorts
Savior of the Great White North.
Is such a fussy eater
On every dinner date
He asks an ump to brush his plate.
By James Finn Garner
On this beautiful summer day in June
The Royals rise and the White Sox swoon
The Astros still dream of their trip to the moon
The Red Sox hope they aren’t peaking too soon
While the Yanks obsess over things picayune
The Rangers and Jays field their share of goons
Tampa ponders a move to Saskatoon. . .
And Epstein’s still the smartest guy in the room.
by James Finn Garner
Little John Gibbons
Has lost his mittens
And doesn’t know where to find them.
He gets tossed from the game
Time and again
To search the clubhouse where he’s confined, then.
by Stephen Jones
In baseball, since time began,
Players and clubs never forget.
What you did, you Blue Jay man,
We’ll repay . . . That you can bet.
Bautista must’ve known this
When he faced off with Texas.
His flip of the bat last year
Really burned the Rangers’ ear:
The unwritten code was broken
And some revenge must be taken.
He got plugged and went to first–
That should’ve ended Ranger thirst.
But when he slid hard into second,
Mr. Bautista didn’t reckon
He’d end up in a stadium ring
With Odor, who took the first swing.
Now, of course, it’s all the news
On ESPN, YouTube and other venues.