Browse all poems and songs in the 'Management' Category


Unctuous Aiken Poem

By Stuart Shea

Houston drafted a pitcher named Aiken
Then said he was damaged, though his elbow ain’t achin’.
No one agreed on appropriate bacon,
Makin’ non-achin’ Aiken’s a special deal-breakin’.

 



Sports Franchise Owners

by Stephen Jones

They’re mental about money.
Win-lose, $ is king.
But truth-be-told,
They’re not so bold
When the cash drawer rings.

Except when their brand
Is elevated,
And its cost is weighed
Against profit, loss
And what tomorrow brings.



Clown Question, Bro

By Stuart Shea

“Does Bryce Harper hustle?”
For what is this bustle?
Why are he and his manager in such a tussle?

“Does Bryce Harper hustle?”
Is he a Jack Russell?
Or is Matt Williams’ brainpan made solely of muscle?

 

Stu’s new book, Wrigley Field: The Long Life and Contentious Times of the Friendly Confines, is available now.  Buy it today!

 



Numbers Game: If 9 Were 7

by Stephen Jones

Alexander Joy Cartwright, club member
Of the old New York Knickerbocker,
Declared 9 innings in 1845 –
Something we still keep alive.

Modern baseball’s inventor –
Tired of game disorder –
Called a dream field to order
When he gaveled “9” the number.

Now stirs a business suggestion:
Make baseball’s 9 a 7.
Why?  Because the game’s too slow,
Because younger fans are “no-show.”

Mr. Cartwright worked with geometry,
Not with something fiduciary.
Since when, he might opine,
Is baseball governed by bottom line?

 



American League West 2014 Spring Training Haiku

By Stuart Shea

ASTROS
An Appel a day
Would keep the losses away
But he’s not yet ripe.

ANGELS
Ask A. Moreno–
Trout fishing in Cali
Can be expensive.

ATHLETICS
Free and well-favored,
No-names and others’ castoffs
Find their own success.

MARINERS
East coast import
Finds rain not to his liking
Even under roof.

RANGERS
Wash likes sac bunting.
His fellow skippers are glad
To accept the out.

 

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Heavy Hitters

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