Browse all poems and songs in the 'Management' Category


Tony Takes the Wheel

By Stuart Shea

Now that he’s leading the Diamondbacks,
Tony LaRussa had better make tracks.
Get rid of the manager, GM, and crew,
Blow up the caravan and start something new.

Bring in some analysts, give fans a shock,
Keep Phoenix from fielding a laughing stock.
(There’s already enough in AZ for comedy–
Sheriff Joe, desert sprawl, gated communities.)

Not that I’m suggesting anything rash,
But Kirk and Kevin belong in the trash.

 



“Now Stinking for the Phillies…”

By Stuart Shea

Darin Ruf ain’t got the stuff,
And Ryan Howard’s no longer powered.
Ben Revere has value unclear,
And there’s little regard fo’ Antonio Bastardo.
Pity Dominic Brown, whose average is down,
And Cody Asche, who is far from flashy.
Even Cliff Lee and Carlos Ruiz
Are suffering from the same disease.
So who’s the chiff of this team of stiffs?
Ruben Ameero, who seems like a zero.

 



Dead Tradeline in Kansas City

By Stuart Shea

The Royals don’t think that they’re winners,
The Royals don’t think they’re beginners.
They won’t buy and won’t sell,
Which may be just as well
If they want to remain others’ dinners.

 



Joe Torre

by Stephen Jones

Joe Torre
Made his way
To Cooperstown
Because he showed
His greatest stat
Was to listen
To what was said
So, he quietly led
By example
Showing patience
And humanity
In the dugout
On the field
And before any camera

 



Free and Fair Trade

By Stuart Shea

What’s the price
For David Price?
A bowl of rice
With a ton of spice?
A new device
That gives advice?
A pair of dice,
or Heidi Fleiss?
A box of lice
Would not be nice,
and a bunch of mice
Squashed in a vise
Will not entice
A deal for Price.

 

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Copyright 2007 Bardball.