Browse all poems and songs in the 'Fans' Category


Interleague Play

By Millie Bovich

Here’s a message for baseball’s commish.
Just read this ’cause that is my wish:
Interleague play’s a loss
Are you listening, boss?
Tiger baseball’s my favorite dish.

Let’s make it the way that it was
Just the All-Stars and Series because
We’ll know who’s the best
Let each league pass the test
For the cheers, or the jeers, or guffaws!

 



Hot Doggerel

by Hilary Barta

Take me out to the ballgame
(at Mega Predatory Capitalism Corp Park)
Take me out to the crowd
(taking selfies, texting their “friends” and checking email)
Buy me some peanuts and crackerjack
(How much? They’re PEANUTS!)
I don’t care if I never get back
(Actually, I do have to work in the morning)
For it’s root, root, root for the home team
(full of spoiled, right-wing millionaires)
If they don’t win, it’s a shame
(There’s always next year)
So it’s one, two, three strikes you’re out at the old ball game!
(now new and “improved” with replay challenges)

 



Expectorations

by the Village Elliott

In honor of Gaylord Perry, whose statue was unveiled at Pac Bell Park on Saturday:

Giant statue of Giant legit,
Cy Young sculptured bronze polished in spit.
Cooperstown ends career,
Hurler started right here:
Gaylord Perry expectorates it.

 



You’re Gonna Miss Alex Rodriguez

by James Finn Garner

As the end of his playing days appears,
I need to ask: Whither A-Rod?
There’ll be no other player left at his tier
On whose neck you can gleefully trod.

No gaffes to rehash, no mistakes to cheer,
No insinuations on his bod,
No schadenfreude thoughts to slur in your beer
That he’s a bum, a starlet, a fraud.

You won’t see Alex this time next year,
And the absence you’ll feel will be odd
Til you choose someone else, with your conscience so clear,
And condemn him like an Old Testament God.

 



Adjusted Fire Sale

by the Village Elliott

Billy Beane’s yearly trade deadline sale
Causes A’s fans once more to go pale.
Fans know once they adjust,
And new A’s earn their trust,
Players’re traded next year without fail.

 

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Copyright 2007 Bardball.