Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
by James Finn Garner
For all the times you’ve prayed to me,
Beseeching for a victory–
“Let him strike out,” “We need this hit” –
And clogged my in-box with this stuff,
You choose to hold Opening Day—
Praise be to me—on Good Friday?
People, watch you don’t make me mad,
Or the Tiges will get what the Lions had.
.
Posted 4/9/09.
by Hart Seely
Robbie Cano,
He’s very rich.
Robbie Cano,
Won’t take a pitch.
Robbie Cano,
Both night and day,
Robbie Cano,
Just swings away.
Robbie Cano,
In spring and fall,
Robbie Cano,
Won’t take a ball.
Robbie Cano,
Makes too much dough,
Robbie Cano,
He’s gotta go.
.
Hart Seely is the author of Mother Goose Goes to Washington, as well as Oh Holy Cow: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, newly released in a 15th-anniversary edition. He often hangs around the Yankee website, It is High, It is Far, It is….caught, offering tasteful and constructive comments to management and players alike.
Posted 4/8/09
By Gary Gillette
O! Hear me mighty
Bards of pastime poesy.
Spring spits in our face.
.
Posted 4/7/09
by Doug Fahrendorff
April
Warm weather returns
Like a long-absent friend
Opening day
Last season’s disappointments
Forgotten
Expectations high
For the new season
Will this finally be
Next year.
.
Posted 4/6/09
By Stuart Shea
ANGELS
Without its K-Rod,
Sun-dappled Orange County
Prepares for a fight.
ATHLETICS
Green-and-gold adorned
Athletes play in stadia
Named for software.
RANGERS
In football country,
The titans of summer’s game
Proceed unnoticed.
MARINERS
Tho Junior returns,
Creaky knees and failing sight,
The M’s will blow chunks.
.
Posted 4/3/09