Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
We could’ve gone to SeaWorld
The ocean sounds like fun
Instead we sit in the hot heat sun
And watch a game of chance
Is it a game or more a test?
Road-tired vets that have to play
Minted fresh kids who demand their say
Now, then, a years-old dance
It’s a fine, fine line they walk
For us a lazy day
A beer, a dog, just to get away
It takes work to make romance
BALTIMORE ORIOLES
Each summer’s the same—
Young hopefuls and old hopeless
Trapped in the basement.
BOSTON RED SOX
The Hub returns to
Valentine’s Day, which we thought
Was ten years ago.
NEW YORK YANKEES
It seems so pettitte—
That the biggest worry is
Who’ll be fifth starter.
TAMPA BAY RAYS
Quality starters,
Like oranges, can be grown
By best and brightest.
TORONTO BLUE JAYS
O young club of hope,
Answer me this one question:
Have you any chance?
Reyes gone.
Life goes on.
New woes take
time to bake.
Now Johan
can’t pitch/can?
Either way,
sad to say,
fans don’t care,
won’t be there.
“Citifield,
where Mets yield.”
Money’s tight
wallet’s light.
Can’t pay loans,
Wilpon phones
MLB
just to see
if they can
find a plan.
Get some jocks
with high socks,
shirts tucked in
after win.
Will Dave Wright
now take flight?
Song of swan,
“Reyes gone.”
Ron Kaplan is the head honcho at the excellent blog, Ron Kaplan’s Baseball Bookshelf, which is about baseball but not strictly about books.
I thought …
why does a baseball
seem to get bigger
as it gets closer
and then it hit me
Arizona-tanned batters are belting
And throwers their catchers are pelting
With sliders and splitters
And striking out hitters
As the snow in the bleachers is melting.
Keep up with Hilary’s art at Surly Hack Attack and with his limericks at LimerWrecks.