by James Finn Garner
The Northwest, known for its lumber,
Was at a loss to figure Phil Humber
Who deftly dialed the M’s number
In shadows, sun and penumber.
Could Starbucks have ended their slumber?
No matter, their bats were encumbered
In a masterpiece, shaded in umber,
The perfecto for new ace, Phil Humber
I would have submitted one, but mine was dumber.
I find that pretty hard to believe.
Well…
At Wrigley such White Sox perfection
Will signal some slight introspection
To consider one’s flaws
And to give one just cause
For a swig of Bud Light and dejection.
Humber’s perfect pitch
His done-slider mostly it
Good for The White Sox
Even though the batter
Should’ve run to first
Here’s something Stu posted on Facebook, regarding the Mariners’ Brendan Ryan:
If you’re losing in a no-hitter,
Don’t stand there and argue, all bitter!
You should run to first base
And THEN make your case!
If not, your team’s bound for the shitter.
Wait, I finally got Hil’s first joke from yesterday.
Wait for it…
LOVE the title.