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A-Rod’s Back

by Hart Seely

The season’s dwindling like a fuse,
Like long-lost hopes for Philip Hughes,
That streak in May? T’was just a ruse.
Now A-Rod’s back:
Break out the boos.

We burned through Adams, Nix and Cruz,
Mere phantoms in the mainstream news.
Now nothing’s left, we’ve naught to lose,
Folks, A-Rod’s back:
Break out the boos.

We diehard fans don’t get to choose
How far to walk within these shoes.
Our loyalties we won’t excuse,
We have no right to sing the blues.
Friends, A-Rod’s back:
Break out the boos.

For an overdose of Yankee schadenfreude, check out Hart’s blog, It is High, It is Far, It is . . . Caught.

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Don’t Spare the A-Rod

by Hilary Barta

His homers amassed near the best
At doping he’s passed ev’ry test
.      But the bum took a boost
.      As it’s come home to roost
A-Hole has the brass to contest.

 

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Trade Observation

by Stephen Jones

Jake Peavy traded to the Red Sox?
A needed gift, as far as Boston goes –
To match Tampa heat in the stretch
With mound-building of its own.

And it seems the White Sox,
Hedging with fan-constituents, are
Waving the banner of future prospects.

Peavy said it right, his emotion true:
“Thank you Chicago.  It’s been an honor.
You are first class and I will never forget you.”

 

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The Cream and the Clerihew (Biogenesis Edition)

By James Finn Garner and Stuart Shea

Alex Rodriguez,
A swing and a mezz.
To avoid having his paycheck shorn
Will take more than a magical unicorn.

Bud Selig
Don’t much dig
Guys who drug up to keep their bodies from wearin’
Unless, of course, they’re Henry Aaron.

Nelson Cruz
Is going to lose
If he appeals his case
And people throw his minor league records in his face.

Bud Selig
If he were like “Zelig”
Would appear at different points in time
And let others be punished for his crimes.

Jhonny Peralta
Didn’t say it wasn’t his fault-a.
He’ll take his suspension
To not jeopardize his pension.

Bud Selig
Is a useless relic
From when players did what they were told
And owners hoarded all the gold.

 

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Summertime Blues

by Doug Fahrendorff

Early optimism
Of Brewer fans
Fades in the heat of mid-summer
Multiple problems emerge
Braun and Biogenesis
Eventual suspension
Injuries to key players
Starting pitching meltdown
Bright spots in a lost season
Segura and Gomez
Exceed expectations
Lucroy and Aoki
Steady contributors
Still defeats pile up
Last place
Early draft pick seems assured
Teams future
Shrouded in questions