The National Pastime

by Tony Puma

“Take me out to the ball game”

Please stand for the National Anthem.

The Home Team takes the field: PLAY BALL!

Bottom of third, man on base,
pitch low and inside, count 3 & 2.
Fastball, strike 3, Batter out.
Man left on base.

The Mick, Duke, Willie, Jackie, Pee Wee,
The Scooter, Yogi, Joe D., Dizzy and Daffy,
Charlie Hustle.

Who’s on first. Abbott & Costello.

Red Sox and White Sox.

“take me out with the crowd”

Twi-light double header:
Cardinals and Orioles.

Da’ Reds/Dem Bums/ The Gas House Gang
Murderers Row/ The Bronx Bombers.

Reliever: South Paw ,Knuckleballer, 2.52 ERA.

The Sultan of Swat/The Splendid Splinter.

The Iron Man.
Lou Gehrig’s disease.

“buy me some peanuts and Cracker Jack”

Bottom of 7th, nothing-nothing.
Seventh inning stretch.

Padres and Angels.

A No-Hitter/A Perfect Game.
Holy Cow!

The Bleachers.
Ebbets/Wrigley/Fenway.

“I don’t care if I never get back”

Designated Hitter/Pinch Hitter.
Foul ball/Double play.
Catcher gives the sign.
Tying run at the Plate.

The Yankees win the World Series!
Brooklyn Dodgers and New York Giants:
NOT.

The Metropolitans.
The Nationals.

Topps Baseball cards.

Indians and Braves.

Can’t anyone here play this game?
Casey Stengel.

“let me root, root, root for the home team”

Rain delay/Box scores/Extra innings/K’s/RBI’s.

Negro League:
Only the ball was white.

Where have you gone Joe Dimaggio . . .
Paul Simon.

Devil Rays and Marlins.

Frozen Rope/Texas Leaguer.
Bull Pen/Home Plate/Batter’s Box.
Cooperstown.
Old-Timers Day/All Star Game.

I GOT IT!

“if they don’t win, it’s a shame”

Tagged out/Stolen base.
A swing and a miss.
Pitcher’s mound/Rosin bag/The Rubber.

Red Bird/Phillie Phanatic.

Cubs and Tigers.

A Sinker, down-and-out.
Bunt/Sacrifice/Pitch-out
Popped-up/Loaded bases.

“for it’s one, two , three strikes you’re out

I watch a group of kids playing
baseball in a cow pasture.

“at the old Ball Game.”

 

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