Rabbit Ears

by Stuart Shea

“Rabbit Ears,” the fans all say . . .
“Rabbit Ears,” stick to the play!

Don’t chase after players; don’t be dumb,
Don’t look for a reason to use your thumb

Don’t be so sensitive to criticism,
Even if your work is seen through a prism

That blows up each and every mistake
That a home plate umpire seems to make.

Otherwise, plate umpires soon may be
As useful as rabbit ears on a TV.