by James Finn Garner
Rich Hill
Took the pill
And struck out six
With his little soccer kick.
Kenta Maeda
Might want to look into ayurveda
A holistic theory of medicine
That might help him pitch more than two batters in.
Manny Machado
Is a no-hustle desperado
Even in the NLCS
He’ll prove he’s a dirty ess.
Cody Bellinger?
There’s no telling, sir,
Who will wear the hero’s coat
When the team is packed with so many goats.