by Greg Simetz
Fans remember well
Thompson’s ‘Shot Heard ‘Round the World’
Giants fans cheered
Dodgers fans hurled
But a new shot was heard
at Guaranteed Rate
causing Sox fans to scatter
after only Beer Number Eight
A smuggled gun went undected
In belly fat it was tucked
And when the lard pulled the trigger
even LaRussa woke up
One person was wounded
another was grazed
but the White Sox kept playing
losers still but unfazed
Then peace was restored
when cops ID’d the plump chick
and in court she was sentenced
to life on Ozempic.