by James Finn Garner
Michael Cuddyer
Might hit the ball higher
On the moon, which has thinner air
Than Denvair.
Dustin Pedroia
Suffers from paranoia.
Though he doesn’t dislike him,
He’s sure the base runner wants to spike him.
Yoenis Cespedes
Doesn’t need us.
He keeps his cool by hitting homers
And ignoring racist tweets from gomers.
Miguel Cabrera
At the plate is a terra.
He’ll win a second Triple Crown
With his mates in Motown.