by James Finn Garner
Oh, the weather outside is frigid
I’ve frozen off several digits
We’ve waited five months for this, y’all,
Let’s play ball, let’s play ball, let’s play ball!
White flakes on our caps and faces
And smudgepots at all the bases
It feels much less like spring than fall
Let’s play ball, let’s play ball, let’s play ball!
.  When the Cubs try and bunt one on
.  It’ll come out an infield snowman
.  Good thing Lester’s not on the mound
.  He can’t bounce it to pick off his man
The hurlers feel cold and rusty
The runners are harnessing huskies
It’s high time to start a pub crawl–
Let’s play ball, let’s play ball, let’s play ball!