by Stephen Jones
MLB, in its wisdom,
Is turning to PCs —
To further clarify
What we already know:
In order to appeal
To a younger audience,
All games
Will now be defined
By strikeouts, home runs
And walks only,
And therefore
Will be played
As quickly as possible.
Teams will be penalized
For any and all
Between-the-lines,
Around-the-bases stuff.