by Fred Lovato
Those days of my youth
when starters lasted seven
seem so far away
Slanguage by Siergey #11
by Jim Siergey
Big Klu
by James Finn Garner
When Leo the Lip tried to name
The five strongest bats in the game
He omitted Ted Klu
Hinted he lived in the zoo
Human being? He’s not quite the same.
When Hall of Fame manager Leo Durocher was once asked by a writer to name five of the strongest players in baseball, he complied. However, when the writer pointed out that he’d left Ted Kluszewski off the list, Durocher huffed and said, “Kluszewski? I’m talking about human beings!” Happy 100th birthday, Big Klu!
Hello, Goodbye
by James Finn Garner
Guardian Anthony Gose
Comes and goes
Goes and comes
Up and down I-71
Up to Cleveland
Down to Columbus
Too bad to keep
Too good to dump
Four times in a month
He’s been DFA’d,
Eerily close to Buddy Holly:
“Don’t Fade Away.”
Tommy’s Guarantee
by Tommy Lasorda
I have never, ever,
since I managed,
ever
told a pitcher to throw at anybody,
nor will I ever.
And if I ever did,
I certainly wouldn’t
make him throw
at a
f–king .130 hitter like Lefebvre
or f–king Bevacqua,
who couldn’t hit water
if he fell
out of a f–king boat.
And I guaran-f–king-tee you this:
When I pitched
and I was going to pitch against a team
that had guys on it
like Bevacqua,
I sent a f–king limousine
to get the c–ksucker
to make sure
he was in the motherf–king lineup
because I kicked that c–ksucker’s ass
any day of the week.
He’s a f–king motherf–king big mouth,
I’ll tell you that.
