Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
1BÂ Â Pop Joy
2BÂ Â Bill Smiley
SSÂ Â Jurickson Prozac
3BÂ Â Chipper Jones
LFÂ Â Smead Jolley
CFÂ Â Happy Felsch
RFÂ Â Jim Gleeson
CÂ Â Joe Garrulous-giola
LHPÂ Â Happy Foreman, Drew Smyly, John Smiley, Aaron Laffey
RHPÂ Â Happy Townsend, Julian Merryweather, Dave Jolly, Buddy Lively
MGRÂ Â Jolly Cholly Grimm
MLB showcase
low-grade slo-pitch uniforms
sighs of disbelief
Who was it,
What savvy pundit
Or, more likely,
What marketing employee
Decided to layer
All the All-Star players
In red and blue clown
Suits, or as actors in “Tron”?
Cole Ragans
Believes that pagans
Get a bad rap in the papers
And also happen to be great landscapers.
Josh Naylor
Has a great tailor
Who crafts slacks for travel
That don’t unravel.
Isaac Paredes
Loves eating spiedies,
Burgoo, tamales, chislic, etouffee–
All the regional dishes of the USA.
Carlos Correa
Has nary a
Bad word to say
About the films and good works of Danny Kaye.
The Kenes/Judge first-inning showcase
Was anticipated,
And both the fans and commentators
Were elated
When — bells ringing — it occurred.
But it was a bit of a letdown:
No fireworks — an HR or strikeout —
When the Judge grounded out to third …
And then it was all over too soon.