by Rollin Lynde Hartt
Lives there a man with soul so dead
But he unto himself has said,
“My grandmother shall die today,
And I’ll go see the Giants play”?
Taken from Crazy ’08 by Cait Murphy.
NL East Limerick
by Mac Thomason
There once was a manager named Willie,
Who drove all the tabloid writers silly.
But what’s really funny
Is that with all their money
The Mets finished after Atlanta and Philly.
You can see more of Mac Thomason’s writing at his blog, Bravesjournal.com.
Posted 5/22/08
Jason and the Golden Thong
by Hart Seely
On days when drives are flying long,
And pitchers wonder what’s gone wrong?
The Bronx winds sing this joyous song:
“Giambi’s in his golden thong!”
Each swing reveals Giambi’s might,
Each wince inspires his mates to fight,
They know too well his painful plight:
One ball hangs left, one ball hangs right.
He leads the veteran team attack,
True courage, he shall never lack!
He eyes the pitch, then takes his whack
As golden threads ascend his crack.
Then comes the time when life turns wrong,
When wins grow short, and losses long,
And Bronx winds sing their saddest song:
“Giambi’s lost his golden thong!”
Hart Seely is the author of the hilarious Mother Goose Goes to Washington, as well as Oh Holy Cow: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, newly released in a 15th-anniversary edition. He often hangs around the Yankee website, It is High, It is Far, It is….caught, offering tasteful and constructive comments to management and players alike.
Posted 5/21/08.
You Never Forget Your First Pitch
by James Finn Garner
Tiger cub Freddy Dolsi’s
First major-league pitch
Was to Manny Ramirez.
(Now, ain’t that a bitch?)
Freddy went down the middle
To show off his heat.
Manny clobbered that apple
Five hundred feet.
The much-touted Tigers
Can’t seem to catch flame
With their pitchers untested,
Senescent or lame.
To young Freddy we wish an
Improved rookie year.
Every guy’s not Ramirez,
But it’s uphill from here.
Posted 5/20/08
“Take Me Out To The Ballgame” in Yiddish
Posted 5/19/08