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The Closest Thing to a Cubs World Series

by Sid Yiddish

Now that Barack Obama has won the U.S. presidential election, it’s the closest thing the Northside will ever be in contention, let alone get to a World Series, even if Obama is from the Southside.
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You see, unlike the Chicago Cubs fans who relentlessly enjoy beating up their rivals bloody, both physically and with words, the White Sox fans wouldn’t do it even if you offered them all the money in the world, because like Obama & his crew, all those guys who support those who wear the black & white uniforms know the right thing to do.
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They know how to stick together, through all kinds of nasty weather and just rough it in the muddy playing fields, even if there’s no yielding or letting up or break in-between.
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See, that’s how the Southside grows, just takes what they are given and goes with the flow.
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So, it’s time to put aside that loveable losers blue and have a little pride for a change, because now that Obama has won the election, it’s a great victory for all of us!
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Not
Republican
Versus
Dem.
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Unlike Cubs fans who always cry out, “Wait ‘til next year,” next year is here for Obama and the rest of us, starting right now.

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For more on Sid Yiddish’s poetry, music and performances, check out his My Space page.

Posted 11/13/08

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It’s Unreal

By Stuart Shea

Real Brewers don’t go out of business so fast.
Real White Sox don’t unravel in hours.
And actual Angels don’t fall from the stars
And land on their butts.

And real Cubs don’t slink out with their tails between their legs
Like a pack of whipped mutts.

Posted 10/16/08

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Armageddon Somethin’ Goin’ On

by James Finn Garner

Some say we face the End Times,
With ice caps disappearing,
Financial pains and hurricanes,
And war with Russia nearing.

But th’ hills of Armageddon
Will look like fields of clover
If the Pale Hose and Cubs oppose
Each other in October.

We’ll see blue-faced yuppies pounce
On shirtless mokes with mullets,
The Bridgeport night with bombs alight,
and Bernie’s strafed with bullets.

The hordes of Satan’s army
And counterparts from Heaven
Will find that they’ve not much to save
If the Series goes to seven.

Posted 10/1/08

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Land of 10,000 Chokes

by James Finn Garner

Defeating the Twins isn’t easy
In that convention hall they call a dome,
But who could foresee the series would be
Like the Vandals’ destruction of Rome?

The White Sox wasted the season.
The grinders’ swings turned to hacks.
So thoroughly owned were the Sox, they’re showin’
Herm Schneider rug burns on their backs.

Now the players can mutter and grumble
While the Cubbies are showered with cheers.
A Subway Series?  Not this time, dearies.
Check back in another 100 years.

Posted 9/26/08