Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
I realized, late in the game,
That things have changed–it’s not the same.
The future of baseball is now
Summed up in just one word–pow.
No more round-the-bases conga dancing–
It’s power pitching and power hitting.
Maybe this’ll bring in younger fans.
That’s what MLB wants in the stands.
Anyway: live arm … and live bat–
Right now, it’s as simple as that.
Pitching déjá vu:
Once a Cub, now a Yankee
But same tribe of bats
Luis Severino
Certainly had his mojo,
And Kahnle shut the door.
But what are the chances
That Dellin Betances
Gets back to dominance?
Is it mechanical,
Or something that’s mental,
Which has swayed his confidence?
All of a quick-sudden
The heat that he’s servin’
Is looking tenuous, at best.
Or, as one fan did say:
“His pitches may not get over the plate,
But at least he struck out a fence.”
Hard to figure–how Joe Girardi
Suddenly became a headlight-deer,
When he didn’t challenge a call
Last Friday night.
Sure, we saw it all
(Via instant replay’s unerring broadcast)
And it was clear that the ball
Had ricochet’d off the knob
Of a Chisenhall bat
(And, rightly, it shoulda been called
A not-hit-by-pitch foul ball).
Yep, it probably swung the game.
The Yankees went on to blow
Their five-run lead, and the Indians
Won it– 9 to 8. Now it seems
Everyone’s yelling “Off
With his head!” like an angry mob,
But not me. After all, since
2008, the Yankees can boast
The best winning percentage
In all the league–and that’s
All been on Joe Girardi’s watch.
I adore the playoffs
When the season’s on the line
Mistakes a bit more tragic
Nice plays near divine
Veterans get one last lap
And rookies get to shine
I only wish they hadn’t made me
Hate “Sweet Caroline”