Reviving the Art of Baseball Doggerel
Wanna clobber Corey Kluber?
The very notion is absurd.
His yakker’s as hard to sit on
as the eggs of a dodo bird
Hey Clevelanders! Michael X. Ferraro wrote a satirical novel called Circus Catch that examines the plight of being a football fan in your otherwise sport-tastic town! Look for it now!
Wha’happened, Red Sox Nation?
Cleveland was more resilient,
That’s what — and even with
A banged-up rotation.
So, no late-inning magic —
No Big Papi and his swinging stick.
In fact, the Boston bats mostly were
A disappearing act.
Funny, how it goes —
how the regular season crescendo
Can go out the postseason window,
When one team’s hot
And the other is not.
Tell me, has it come to this–
To be outhit by Coco Crisp?
To win outright the AL East,
Then be swept out like autumn leaves?
To watch my teammates flailing madly
And our hurlers piching badly?
Then step out for a curtain call
And have all Fenway watch me bawl?
I know I’ve won three rings, but still–
I’m not quite set to give up the thrill.
The Cavs’ title notwithstanding,
poor Cleveland’s back to Clevelanding–
a fielding fiasco
by Carlos Carrasco
plus Pryor’s alleged grandstanding.
Carlos Carrasco injured, exits after 2 pitches
The Browns get hosed on a ridiculous taunting penalty against Terrelle Pryor
In honor of Gaylord Perry, whose statue was unveiled at Pac Bell Park on Saturday:
Giant statue of Giant legit,
Cy Young sculptured bronze polished in spit.
Cooperstown ends career,
Hurler started right here:
Gaylord Perry expectorates it.